Dec. 19th, 2007

skysha_tranqui: (Serenity Sanity Is Relative --> pic by m)
Last night was really nice - I got to yani & co's just as Laura was arriving, lil' Steph was already there, and Yani got in a few mins after me. We just sat and chatted with xmas music and Yani's homemade mulled wine. She did the table up with crepe paper and candles, and laid out crisps, nuts, german biscuits and chocs. ^_^

Then after all the mulled wine was drank we piled on the couch and watched The Holiday. Didn't leave there's 'til 1:30am, but was def worth it.

We still haven't booked the plane tickets though, and now we're aiming to get them sorted the first week of next term. Which is annoying/worrying 'cause the original plan was to get them sorted the first week of this term just gone. :/ There's nothing to be done about it though, 'cause Yani's going to Germany, lil' Steph's going back to Milton Keynes, and I think Laura's planning on staying in Whitby after this week.

~*~*~*~

Today has been a bit of a waste of time so far.

I got up at 10:30, showered etc, loitered about 'til 12, had some lunch, then went on to campus.

I wanted to get books out the library and possibly meet up with Laura there for a bit - but the stupid thing was closed because of either a fire drill or an actual fire, and everyone was queueing up outside. I couldn't see Laura there, waited for 15mins or so, but they showed no sign of actually doing anything, and people had already been there half an hour, so I just left.

Tried to go to the health centre to get that out the way, but the stupid thing had closed 15mins before I got there. Decided there was no point in my going to a comp room to email journals to myself, so I waddled back here.

Then I got the idea of making bread into my head, so did some recipe research, then had to go to the co-op to get ingredients, and have just now put the dough in the airing cupboard to raise.

Am quite excited tbh - I ♥ freshly baked bread! Plus it will go really nice with my dinner (I'm going to make chicken noodle stew); just hope it turns out alright!

But yeah, that was a bit of a waste of time too.

So now, to make up for that, I'm going to figure out how long I have to do my essays in over xmas, and try to work out some kind of plan so I get it all done - and not in some massive rush at the end!

~*~*~*~

My trip home
I didn't like the bit when I stayed at my dad's. It's a nice enough place, but it's very small and self-contained, so it felt like his nest, and I was intruding. It didn't help that he hasn't given me keys to the place, or made any mention of doing so...or that he seemed really nervous/proud of the place. I think he thinks it's not as good as mum's place, and so when I was visiting he was waiting for me to tell him the place didn't suit him, or was boring or something.

Thing is, it's a great house, it just doesn't feel like a home. It doesn't have a personality. And so I can't see him being anything other than bored when he's actually there.

It was a bit awkward as well 'cause I thought Katie was coming over to chat & then we'd go shopping - she came over, intending to whisk me out straight away, but dad had gone to fetch dinner for me & him, figuring Katie would pick at it a bit & talk with us. So she basically turned around and left straight away, and dad didn't even see her.

Then after dinner, dad went out & left me in the house on my own. So I watched tv for 2 hours.

I had some of the hot chocolate he bought specially for me, and chilled. And it was great. It's the perfect living room setup, the kitchen's really good. And I didn't feel awkward. But when dad came back I did. He doesn't like watching tv, and only bought one so visitors could watch it if they like, and when he came back her let me finish watching my program, but then he suggested we go to the pub.

So we went to try his new local, and it's really nice, but it's not my age-range, so I felt a bit out of place. Dad kept saying he didn't recognise anyone, and I think he felt out of place too, but then 2 of his squash friends appeared and we spent the evening chatting to them. I could talk to them a bit as well, but I did feel largely redundant - like I was just there to support my dad if he didn't make any friends. :s

Sad thing is, it was easier to talk to my dad's friends than it often is with my dad. I just find it really hard to keep the conversation flowing with my dad, and I have to be careful what I say in offhand comments 'cause he does latch on to them - and often I don't mean them the way he interprets them.

So going to mum's afterwards was a relief - purely because I don't have to talk to anyone there. I don't feel like I need to keep them amused, whereas with my dad I do.

I'm dreading xmas eve now though. That's when I'm at dad's, just him & me, and I have to 'keep him entertained'. If I told him that he'd say I don't have to, and I shouldn't feel like I have to...but when I'm with him that's what happens!

Hopefully it'll be okay, but that's the most I can really hope for - it might be fun if Katie was there as well, but she's with mum for the day.

Anyway, managed to waste another half hour doing this, so I'd better go do something useful now!

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Sarah

April 2008

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